I decided to start a new series of posts in this blog, that have less to do with my life and more with my old interest for paranormal phenomena, motivated from recent changes in the way I see all this fuzz about the unexplained, the believer's dedication to their side of truth and the debunker's insistence to disprove everything.
The last book I bought on the field had something to do with the year 2012 (Why do people hope for something out of the ordinary to happen, even if this would mean doom and destruction? Why do I secretly hoped that something from this being true? I ask the question because I am disappointed by myself, how I fall in the same category). I have read most of it in the train travelling from Thessaloniki to Athens and back. It was in the middle of June as I remember. I came in Athens to DJ some Amiga demos on a club or something. Now I was coming back home.
In the beginning of the book, the author made you believe that it's not another book by another nationalistic author who wants to believe (or to sell) that the ancient greek gods are coming with their spaceships to save the greek nation or something. From the beginning, the author showed that he had more serious intentions, as to save the reader from the upheaval this subject creates. He mentioned that he doesn't favor any nation, he doesn't put any mainstream aliens in this story, that once upon in the past humanity were wiped out in several periods by natural phenomena, similar as to the ones that are coming near the end of 2012. This thing made me believe that I can trust the author. No aliens, no fancy apocalypse, not favoring nations or religions, just straight raw facts.
After a lot of pages though, the story started to get more incredible. A brown dwarf sun approaching the solar system after several thousand years, a big conspiracy of the elite trying to hide it in order to only save themselves and even a hiding reptilian race (no aliens you said?). And there I was testing belief. How much more focused was I to see what I wanted to see. And how easier it was to believe the replies against the debunker's voice. I was seeing what I wanted to see. And I wanted to believe.
The crisis started at that point. I felt like I was getting away from my quest to seek for the truth. The only true facts (do they exist?) behind all our delusions. I had also seen how much of a believer I am. Don't get me wrong, most writers on paranormal present the facts in such a way that it makes you think that they can't be wrong. No matter the doubt, if I wanted to believe then those writers would give me food not only to believe, but even doubting that most paranormal stories could be somehow misunderstood. They were giving me only the data necessary to make the story feel more true.
I always disliked the people that are called "skeptics" today. Because they seemed to be as eager to debunk everything as much as fanatically as the people who wanted to believe. I even liked the attempt of some people who decided to call themselves zetetics, as a response to blind skepticism. I adored (and still adore) fringe scientists who take the risks to start research into subjects having to do with psychic powers, alternative theories or anything paranormal. Although I recently have my doubts, that maybe their research can be still biased, based on what they want to believe, what they want to see on the results (usually the results of statistical data). I don't have proof about that, I am not saying they are crackpots, I am just starting to become more skeptical. But I really want to see more and more scientists trying to research these hard subjects as objectively as possible. The truth can be found through research, not denial. Maybe it's like being an agnostic rather than an atheist.
However, as I started changing and read some skeptic articles (while also reading about psychological experiments that show how unbelievably we are deluded by the most simple things), I grew more on the idea that maybe, maybe,. even all of these paranormal stories could be cases of delusions, misunderstandings or something else. That even if there are some witnesses from well educated people, air control operators, pilots, astronauts, scientists,. that YES, even these people can make mistakes sometimes (or maybe they have a secret agenda :). My perception switched in a world where there is a possibility what sounded improbable (that all these witnesses can't be wrong, at least a tiny percentage of them could still hold something) can actually be true. Maybe this one crumbled my world of ufo, aliens, fairies, ghosts and strange phenomena into dust while it brighten my view on how deluded can we be or how our perception can be mistaken, how far from the truth we may be, yet thinking that all these make sense.
I think that I have a wider view of the truth. I would like to write several posts in the future in this blog, refering to amazing examples showing that things might not be as they seem, that me and you are living their illusion right this time, I'd like to point arguments towards/against both sides (believers vs skeptics). I'd like to show counter examples on examples that try to say something. This blog will continue with more content about paranormal phenomena, analyzing the religion of believers and skeptics, examples and counter examples that show both sides could be true or wrong or how deluded we may be (I used the word deluded/delusion for the nth time :P). There are really many things running around my head that I'd really like to write here..
Also, the real reason for making the turn from a believer to a disbeliever was not something on the book or some thoughts about it. I think I was emotionally unstable during that time (same time when I desperately needed some drink and got banned from Pouet) and I found a reason to burst. And generally changes feel good in a shaky life (but later I truly changed my mind after reading the skeptics articles). I am not going to praise any "religion" (either belief or skepticism or debunking), I am not going to stay in any of them forever, it's not my quest to join on army of thinkers but to find the truth. And the truth is dynamic, it seems to be changing sides..
I will be back. There are a lot of things I want to write about.